Friday, December 30, 2005

Just as good the 2nd time

I saw King Kong with a friend yesterday and YES - it was just as good the second time around.

Heading out to East Texas tomorrow to see more family. Hoping there won't be too much traffic on this New Years Eve Day.

Been handling a few work-related problems via-email, which is a bit... /thinks for the word... bah - it's the real world.

Kodi is freaking hilarious. He follows me around like--well like a little puppy (he's 1.5 years old). He is constantly bringing me his toy, wanting me to play with him. He rests his head on my leg and looks up at me with this goofy grin on his face, ears pointed, big brown eyes pleading with me. He's been sleeping in my room and just totally adores me. It's what baby Jake used to do - minus the annoying - Kodi is a bit overboard - he's a LOT bigger, droolier... yeah... but he's a sweetheart.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Unpacking my childhood...

Yuuuuup...
I've started unpacking boxes and boxes and boxes of stuff. Did I really leave this much stuff here? Yeesh. Yep more of my life in boxes. Oh and my baby Jake - cremated and placed in a box. *chuckle* I found some sort of odd humor in that... not sick humor mind you - perhaps ironic... I dunno but you have to admit - my new blog title: a life in boxes really fits.

I've also been visiting with my family and friends back here. I got to see my cousin and her three sons (they live in Alabama) - the 15 year old is almost 2 inches taller than me... *does the math* I was 12 years old when he was born... I held him in my arms *boggle* My cousin who lives here, her little girl is growing up so fast!

I've spent a lot of time playing with my parents dog, Kodi:



The cats are enjoying sleeping on my bed - my room is always closed up while I'm away and it's an exciting new place for them to sniff out and take their cat-naps...

Luxor:


Sheba:


Lady:


I baked a bunch of cakes, gingerbread houses and ginger cookies:

Saturday, December 24, 2005

Kong Lives!

Saw King Kong today with the folks.
AWESOME MOVIE.
Even if you have seen someone else play the game :P

There's NO comparison!

BONUS: There was a preview for the new X-Men 3!!!
WAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Consuming Consumers Consume Mass Quantities of Cra....

I'm sitting here at the MSP airport (/love wireless WOOT Dad) and they have CNN on and they just had a bit on how some stores will be getting a few more XBOX 360's in... and it's been bothering me that they've put so much hype into this system, then didn't have nearly enough... I kept saying they're going to come out with more before xmas. And now they are. AND the freaking lady on the TV was saying that the manufactures claim if you see one on the shelf and you are iffy about buying it you SHOULD buy it because who knows when more will come to stores - and xmas is so close... etc.... and some cloak and dagger crap about asking the first person you see working at the store when you walk in - tell them what you want... BAH!

BLOODY HELL. Sitting next to a lady with a cute lil mini doberman and I've seen 3 other lil doggies in the airport today AND NOW they have a bit on CNN bout them as xmas presents. Something bout bunch of dogs coming in from Mexico for really cheap - but they are too sick to make it on their own and how you should ask where they come from before you get them so you don't get one that dies on you.... good lord....

You know how when you have something on your mind - everytime you turn around there IT is... yeah... that's what is happenening to me.
And I'm sad cuz I was doing some number crunching the day before yesterday and it WOULD be cheaper for me to stay in the dorms (since I've been there so long I get whatever the lowest price is)... I might even be able to do it without getting a second job.
But that's not what I really want. I want to move off campus. I want a place of my own. I want a dog (did ya pick up on that?) and I don't want to live in a box anymore. But I don't particularly want to get another job.
/ponder
I have lots of time to obsess about this (and lord knows I do obsess)... and explore my options... yet again I am blessed with options and find myself grumping about them. ugh! Sometimes I feel like I am so ungrateful.
/sigh
BAH!
Anywhooooo........
Getting close to THAT TIME! Need to pack this puppy (er my computer) up and catch my flight home Home HOME!!!!!

Sings:I'll be hOOOOOOme for the holidays....

Monday, December 19, 2005

Describing Aspen E Tall As A Tree

For the first time I wrote something in the description box for my blog.
A life in boxes...
It may not stay, but it is how I feel right now.
I just realized that the cliche is true for me - I live in a box (dorm room), I work in a box (office - no windows), and I even drive a box (Honda Element).
The only one of those I actually enjoy is my car.
1 out of 3 isn't that bad.... is it?

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Round the rough and rugged rocks the ragged rascal rudely ran...

A year ago today my grandfather died (mom's dad).
A year ago tomorrow I came back from New Zealand.

How is that possible?

Early yesterday morning Queenie passed away. She belonged to Aya's uncle, then her mom, and I semi-adopted her a few years ago. And now she is gone...



Death is everywhere.

Ugh looking up that picture... first time since I found out....
/sigh
Such a sweet and happy puppy.

I wrote this after my first grandfather passed away last year and I used it in my blog again after my second grandfather passed away... but it's the best I can come to describing how I feel when I am grieving....

I've been lying in bed thinking about grief. It's an odd thing, extremely painful and yet you can't touch it or even point it out. There's no miracle pill to get rid of the pain, no limb to chop off, there's nothing inside of you they can cut out. It's buried deep inside of you, somewhere around the heart-lungs-throat region. In my experience (17 years) it never goes away fully - it's like a chronic scab - it heals over partially, but if it gets bumped hard enough it flows again. An intangible wound. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's the best I can do at 1:20 am.

Friday, December 16, 2005

The Power of Blogger Compels Me

I'm at the library visiting Aya and before I came here I drove through a certain fast-food chain and ordered a burrito. Not wanting to break the sacred law of the library I ate my dinner while sitting in my car. As I unwrapped my burrito I was struck by a series of memories: whenever I would come home with something like this my Jake would run up to me with his cute little black nose sniffing the air. I'd talk to him and ask him if he'd been a good boy, tempting him with my yummy treats. I'd get all comfortable in my room and then I would break off the top part of the burrito-(you know, the part that's just tortilla), I would tear it into little pieces and ration it out to him as I ate. I guess you could say we had lunch/dinner together. He also loved french fries and any tortilla or roll (especially Grandy's rolls).
He was a funny little guy. When I'd say no more and show him my hands he knew he was done.

Anywho... I totally felt compelled to blog about that. What does that say about me? About my blogging?

Oh and while I was getting my hair - repaired - yesterday I was flipping through a magazine and there was an article about women bloggers... interesting...

Thursday, December 15, 2005

On The Way to Work Today...



Auburn reigns supreme!

THANK GOODNESS!
Aya and I both got our hair fiasco's fixed today.
I'm back to my normal reddish-brown /happy sigh.

This is the only evidence that remains of that nightmare....



It's hard to tell because I took it with my cell phone camera = not very good pic, but trust me blonde hair with my rosey cheeks = YUCK.

Posting pics cuz I can't sleep...

Click for larger image:


From my delay in the twin cities over Thanksgiving break. This is looking out over the center of the Mall of America - Camp Snoopy (like a mini-six flags for younger kids).

____________

This is a rooster which was placed outside of a local restraunt this summer during some rennovations... and now he's all festive...
/chuckle

Do they have more fun?

/sniffle
I...
I'm...
I'm BLONDE!

I asked the girl to do the same thing that had been done before, because my roots were showing a bit and you could see where the highlights started... simple enough... I was standing in front of her for craps sake.
She says sure, no problem...
Next thing I know... I've turned into Marilyn Monroe.
No offense to the blondes of the world, but it's not for me. I like to stick with pretty near my natural hair color - auburny-brown.
/sigh
It could be WORSE.... Poor Aya, I didn't realize how bad it was until after she got under the lady's shears :(
/sigh
We've had some bad hair fiasco's together, but this one might top them all.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Almost Done...

I'm cooking dinner for my floor tonight (last floor activity this year).
I'm getting a haircut tomorrow afternoon - and hopefully seeing King Kong...
I've got a mini-presentation Thursday night.
And that's it.

Seriously.

I have been so freaking stressed for the last month - worrying about my job and my living situation, being sad about Jakester, stressing about the "big one" and the other smaller paper and the presentation I did today... and now it's all over (almost - all the big stuff anyway).

You know that odd feeling you get when you expect to feel relieved but you aren't? That indescrible sensation... It's somewhere between just wanting to crawl into bed and sleep for a week and that nagging sensation that you've got something important to do still... Yeah, that's how I feel right now.
I hate that feeling.
It's frustrating and a major let-down because I was hoping to feel carefree (an entire week earlier than my peers).
Maybe I will reach that feeling after Thursday - when all my academic obligations are fulfilled, my last floor activity is over and my room has been thoroughly picked up and cleaned (UGH does it need it).

Monday, December 12, 2005

Ponderings and Findings

I found a neat new blog, but I need to investigate it further... I just saw lots of fiber, kitties, and some funny stuff...
Really excited cuz apparently there is a ring for spinners - (spinning wheel not the dj) - and I joined that. Guess I'll have to start talking bout my fibering more now.

Sidenote:
How can someone be so full of themself and shite at the same time? I wouldn't think there would be room.... guess I'll chock it up to the old "Anything is possible."

/pat on back
I finished my *BIG* paper and turned it in this morning.
/huge sigh of relief

Working on my presentation for tomorrow, then another small presentation Thursday night and I am DONE. Makes up for all the stress I've had the last month or so.
hehehe It's freaking awesome!!!
Too bad I can't go home right away, gotta do the RA thing and stay til the 21st (which is actually a day earlier than I'm sposed to leave shhhhhh).

Sunday, December 11, 2005

Chronicles...

I took a brief break Friday afternoon to see The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, & The Wardrobe. *cough* filmed in NZ *cough* At least partially :) It was pretty good. I'm in the prossess of re-reading the entire series, but from memory it was pretty accurate (though they added several humorous elements).

Another movie coming out soon, which was filmed when I was there, is King Kong. I'm realllllllly looking forward to this one. I'm actually a bit skeptical about it, but that doesn't stop me from getting all googledy-eyed when I see a preview ;) And the home page for the movie is freaking awesome. I'll definitely be there on Wednesday to see it!

I'm cruising right along on my "big" paper. There was a time when I couldn't imagine coming up with 4 or 5 pages, much less 15-20 pages. Now, I have eleven pages and a two-page bibliography. And no it's not ALL quotes!
I definitely am not meant to be an English major. I know Aya has to pump papers out on a regular basis and this is only the first one I've had to do all semester.... and it's the largest one I've ever had to write. Quite frankly, it's been torture. I was sitting there at the library wallowing in self pitty and Aya kept saying, "You can do it. You'll be fine." I somewhat believed her.
It has been a learning experience though: I much prefer presentations and projects to papers.
Of course I'm taking an online Education class next semester which is all writing based, with several good-sized papers.
heh heh heh
Figures.

Listening to Christmas music at the moment and gazing at my (miniature) lit Christmas tree. I could do that all day, but I must get this paper done!

Happy weekend everyone!

Friday, December 09, 2005

The verdict is in...

Let me break down the fear that has taken over my life for the past three weeks....

Week before Thanksgiving - my RA boss says there is a possibility that I might have to give up one of my jobs (maybe starting Spring semester or hopefully next Fall)
Either the RA (paying for my place to live) or the GA (paying for my school & bills)

My birthday (Friday before Thanksgiving) my boss tells me that the powers-that-be have decided I *DO* have to pick one. Obviously I would have to give up the RA job because the benefits are less. But I love my RA job, the people I work with, and I'd have to move before winter break.
I spent the majority of my birthday drafting a letter of appeal - to let me keep both jobs through the end of the year. (Pointing out that I had been informed at the beginning of the year that there was no problem with me having both positions (I knew this already because Aya had done it for two years and someone else I knew had done it before her) I thought this was a reasonable request, to close out the school year, as promised at the beginning of the school year, with the understanding I would have to pick one or the other for next Fall.

Yesterday - after waiting (semi)patiently for 3 weeks I call the office in charge of making the decision and learn about the letter.
Today at 2pm I called back and the lady took pity on me (they still needed one more signature on the letter) she must have heard the fear/paranoia/exhaustion/hope in my voice. She told me they had decided to let me keep both jobs through the end of this school year, but there is something about taxes... I dunno, I'll find that out when I get the letter. I might have to pay some? (no clue)
So yeah... I don't have to pack and move within the next week! I get to keep both jobs for one more semester! I don't have to worry about finding the funds to pay for where I'm living!

/cheer
/relief

And with all of this shake-up I've also made a decision. I knew that no matter what I would have to find other living arrangements for the Fall semester, so I'm going to start looking for a place to live (this summer) where I can have a DOGGGGY!!!! /bounce
This thought occurred to me before my baby passed away, and now that he's gone I feel this incredible longing to have a puppy. I NEED one. I WANT one. As long as I can find an affordable place to live that allows one (Darn real-life) I will go adopt one from the pound/humane society this summer.

/sigh of relief
I get to keep both of my jobs til the end of the year!
And I get to have a PUPPY!
/cheer

Thursday, December 08, 2005

If patience were the only virtue...

I would have none.

----------

I don't really have anything to blog about just now. I'm sitting in the library at 11:25 pm, waiting for Aya to close the library down. I've been reading and reading and reading (my eyes are tired). I'm trying to get enough information and ideas for my big paper. I'm so intimidated by the number = "15-20 pages", that my brain is permanently locked in a circular pattern. I can't come up with enough stuff to fill that many pages. Obviously I have to, but EEEEP. It's really just 5 pages a day. This has taught me one thing, I am definitely not meant to be an English major. I'll be sticking with Education (Though I'll still take the English classes related to technology).

Heh... I did have something to blog about.
Maybe there is always something to blog about.
I could go to google and type in the first word that came to my mind and be inspired for a blog post.
/ponder
I wonder if I can work that into something, somewhere in the future.
Thesis!
/chuckle
jk

It feels much later than it is. I need to get some sleep so I can get up in the morning and get to work (and not stress about that stupid letter that STILL hasn't come /grumble).

A letter?!?!

That big news... they're sending me a letter "sometime this afternoon or tomorrow."

A letter.
It's coming from THIS campus.
I had them on the phone.
But...
They're sending me a letter.

"Please Mister Postman, look and see
If there's a letter in your bag for me
(Please, Please Mister Postman)
Why's it takin' such a long time...."

do be do be do wop wop....

Monday, December 05, 2005

We all must do things which...

Scare us.



Only my second attempt at sledding, the first being a 9ft hill back in Texas, on one of the rare occasions we got enough snow to do such a thing.
Terrifyingly fun.
______________

Are a little bit crazy.

Staff retreat for Res Life this past weekend. We went to this fancy resort place and got a lovely cabin. (Same place we went 2 years ago when I was an RA)
Fun was had and I jumped in the swimming pool, fully clothed. Still not exactly sure why, but like I say... Craziness is key.
_____________

Intimidate us.

The heat is on, big paper (20 pages) due next Monday. I'm not a big paper writer, I've never had to write many of them, and certainly none this large.
I've also got a presentation coming up and another paper due next Wednesday.

I'm tired of reading already so I'm procrastinating by blogging. Huh... I wonder what the ratio proportion of procrastinators is to bloggers...
/ponder
_____________

And btw: Congratulations to Aya's cousin who just had twin girls on Saturday night :)

Friday, December 02, 2005

Oh and July 7th can't come soon enough

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

Puppy Power!

Is it strange that I reallllllly want to find a place to live where I can have a dog?
I was thinking about this before I lost my baby Jake, knowing I couldn't take him from his life in Texas and bring him to this frozen tundra. After his passing I want it even more. I miss having a little buddy to run errands with, snuggle up with, play with... and I know there will never be another Jake, but there could be another dog. Another four-legged friend. Another... companion.
Fantasizes...
Should I get a pure bred? Or another mutt... love those heinz 57's. I should go to the pound or humane society or find a stray... find one that really needs me. I should find one I have an instant connection to, like Jakester.
I'll never forget the first time I saw him. The pet store next to my parents shop was having a Humane Society Adoption Day. A little boy was holding him under his front arms, the poor dog was dangling about and the mom was yelling at her son to hold him properly. I was in the mindset that I HAD to have a kitten, but my dad suggested this little dog in a kennel (the same dangly one I'd seen earlier). The lady warned us that he was very skittish so we took him next door to my parents shop. She opened the kennel door and he peeked out at us. My parents stayed far away and the woman hid behind the kennel. I called to him, coaxing him out of his safe little box. He came over to me, shivering slightly. I put my hands on him and spoke soft words of comfort and that was it. I was smitten and he had found a trustworthy human. Someone who would never let anything bad happen to him. It took him over a week to come to my mom and years (literally) before he would come to my dad without shivering uncontrollably. He had been abused before he came to us. Horribly abused, we assume by a man. He never liked sitting in laps and he was always afraid of men, cowering behind me whenever one came in the room. Yet he was not a coward. He scared the living daylights out of me one time when a cat that we'd taken in (trying to find another home for it) hissed and spit at me - he chased it around the house barking and growling. Mom and I thought he was going to bite the cat - and were afraid the cat would shred him. He growled menacingly at anything he saw as a threat to me. He was scared of his own shadow, but he would have protected me at any cost.
(Hmmm.... digress much?)
Only dog I ever saw who loved to play Duck, Duck, Goose.
/smile
Silly puppy.

So yeah... I miss having a dog. I love cats, but if I had to pick one or the other it'd be a Dog. Hands down.

When I move out of the dorms I have to find a place where I can have a dog.